Everyone is going through something.
Just because they look fine and put together on the outside doesn’t mean they have it all together. Most of the time it just means they don’t let it show because people just don’t understand and pass judgment on them.
I’ve gotten a lot of opinions and advice over the years. People have told me time after time that I should trust God or press into Him. One of the most common phrases is well if you aren’t happy with your circumstance then do something about it to change them. Don’t keep focusing on what you don’t have. Focus on what you do have.
- Everyone else doesn’t have it all together.
- Everyone is going through something.
- Stop comparing yourself to them.
- There are people worse off than you.
- You should be thankful you aren’t them.
You know what? That is like a stab in the heart right there. Of course, I know that others are worse off than me. Of course, I know that everyone is going through something. I should know this better than anyone.
What I don’t understand is this? Does that make what I am going through any less important? Does that mean my struggles, pain, hurt, and life shouldn’t matter?
Maybe it comes from dealing and living with a chronic health issue for over half my life. Maybe it comes from having to constantly watch others live the life I want. Maybe it’s just because I am a hot mess.
Whatever it is I want to open up and become a little more honest and vulnerable with you. If you have been following me here or over on Instagram you may have noticed that my heart has been changing lately. God has been showing and revealing to me that it’s okay to show the real me to you guys. It’s okay to not be strong all the time.
God has been speaking to me. He has been telling me that it’s totally normal and okay to show my struggles and pain to you all.
If I’m completely honest this summer has been super hard. I’ve been a complete trainwreck. Emotions have been all over the place. Health issues have been in full swing flare up mood. Life has been crazy. I’m just a hot mess express like my bestie Elyse calls me.
Why am I telling you this? Why am I opening up? Yes I know that I could get backlash and could even get criticized for this. But I feel like I need to speak the truth.
You don’t get it until you live it!
There, I said it. Now you can go ahead and think what you want but it’s the truth. Until you have to go through it and live it you don’t fully understand or get it. Sure you can think you know all about it and act like you have all the answers but the hard truth is that you don’t.
I want to share with you a couple things that you can do when you are faced with this kind of situation.
- Don’t accuse someone’s struggle isn’t important. We all go through things. One person’s struggle is just as important as someone elses. For example, one friend is dealing with someone having cancer, while another friend is dealing with constant migrane headaches. Both of these are valid struggles. Both of these affect that person. Don’t belittle or think one is worse than the other. They both are hard to deal with.
- Don’t go telling them that if they want to change their circumstances to just do it. You don’t know everything that is going on and it can do more damage then good sometimes. Changing your circumstances isn’t as easy as some may think. There might be complications that prevent that person from changing even if they want to.
- Don’t believe everything you see on social media. This one here my friend has casued me the most problems. People see that I post mostly good, uplifting, and encouraging posts. I may complain or share my struggle once in a while but everything isn’t alwasy what it appears to be. Social media sometimes gets a bad rap. People don’t post every single struggle or bad, messy parts of life. Most of the time it’s the fun, good times and there’s nothing wrong with that. Just don’t assume that everything is good or that their lives are perfect.
I leave you with this my friends. Show some empathy and compassion. Instead of judging or saying hurtful words try being more understanding. Sometimes just listening and saying, I know that must be hard, you’ll get through this, I’m sorry you are struggle is all they need to hear. Of course you can always pray for them too.
I pray that this encourages you and gives you a little glimpse into my life. Although this summer was rough and hard I can say that God never left my side. He is good! He is faithful! He is always there for me and He brought me through.
Blessings, Grace Mae ❤